Drop the therapist and fix your relationship and your sex life online

it Seems daunting to contact a therapist or sexologist, or you do not feel that your challenges are so extensive that it requires months on end pendant to a therapist, so can an online course be the right thing for you and your girlfriend.

Many Danish therapists are beginning to offer different types of online courses. They typically consist of a series of emails and videos with explanations, training initiative were and homework.

We have taken hold of three of these terapeuer to hear what the idea behind their actions is:

Psychologist Frej Prahl, who you might know from the DR2 program 'Cool facts', have made online-parkurser.dk. For 1995 dollars you get access to 11 videos, where Prahl examines the main themes in the couple relationship (e.g. love, kærlighedssprog, patterns, the importance of underskyldinger, gratitude) with accompanying exercises, as well as five small podcast with guided exercises, to strengthen the intimacy.

He acknowledges that online courses are hardly for the couple, who are in big crisis in the skilsmissens rand:

- It has a more maintaining aim. It may not fix all the problems and make you happy. But it can create some hopefully deep samhørighedsoplevelser between you and your partner.

- It can expand your palette of options in stalemate situations. It can increase the likelihood that you understand why your partner does, who he or she is doing. Maybe it can give you a more playful relationship to your sex life, says Prahl.

Celestine is tantrabehandler and offers 'On with tantra' for 399 kr. It is a series of instructional videos for the couple who is curious about tantra:

- I have made the course on tantra as an online course to be able to reach all who are curious to learn about tantra without necessarily having to show up for a physical course. Quite a few people are perhaps also shy in relation to having to sit with your partner and learn the exercises in a room with other couples.

- And some will want to explore what tantra is, but don't know yet whether it is something for them, and there is an online a great opportunity to get a good introduction to what tantra is and what it can be used for, before one decides to go out of the way.

Here, give the Celestine his sales pitch for the course:

the Course presents according to Celestine a lot of aspects within tantra, which one can use in his life both as a single and if you are in a relationship.

- I debunk a lot of myths about that tantra is just about sex, or need to be a long and complicated practice and only for very spiritual people. Everyone can benefit from tantra - and improve his love - and sex life.

And his life in general, because you will learn the exercises, that give you more energy and joie de vivre, " says Celestine, who has picked the most essential thing out of his 18 year long experience with tantra.

There is no nudity in the videos.

Therapist and sexologist Christiane Meulengracht has for some time offered various online courses. They typically consist of instructional videos, which will be sent on a weekly basis. Here, she talks about her two bestsellers:

- Course 'I Love You' is all about communications and to break through to her, to listen to each other, be clear and be able to notice the own needs and wants, just like you learn to meet your partner's needs and wishes.

The second scenario, 'Spark the spark is started and get in love again' call Meulengracht an online plus course - with a price of 3200 bucks is the most expensive course:

- Because I am in the process invites to live online meetings as a webinar only for those enrolled, which I supplement with extra angles on the material, but also takes the participants ' personal challenges - and it is, therefore, a kind of personal correspondence and rådgivningsrum - like a personal course.

- This course is fairly new and is about to become lovers again in the midst of everyday marmalade. To rediscover the joy of flirting and intimacy and create the headspace to be feminine and masculine and thus maintain the sexual attraction, while we are business partners/parents, etc., says sex therapist.

We took hold of the sexologist and therapist Signe V. Bentzen, to get her take on what are the advantages and disadvantages of online courses. She explains that the online courses basically are books converted to audio/picture.

- There are four obvious advantages to using online courses instead of showing up with a therapist or in a workshop. First, there is a magelighedsfaktor, namely, that In the release that should move you from the couch. It takes place in your own home.

- There is the time factor, namely, that we all together would like to save time where we can, because we pretty much all have a sense that time is a scarce resource. You therefore do it when it fits into, and is not dependent on a third person's time. And you must not spend time to get there and home again.

- So is there a blufærdighedsfaktor, namely, it should pack his personal life out in front of a stranger. It is that many, especially men, who have it a little tight.

And then there is of course genbrugsfaktoren, which is about that if one has not got tapered ears for the first time, so you can ‘rewind’ and get it the second time. So it is tempting and easy to resort to on-line courses, if the couple relationship or sexual skranter, says Bentzen.

She has, however, also has some caveats:

- The solutions and exercises, you will be presented with, after all, is not tailored to your specific situation or needs. For even if for example the theme ‘for a little lust/sex’ may seem to be the same for you as for the neighbor, so it is rarely the same, there is a need to move on things.

- It can for example be, that the neighbor does not want, because he basically kept up with turning on the woman after they have had children, while the inside of you is about to have forgotten how to give time for each other and come in time after 20 years with a blow of career, children and own hobbies.

- If it was two therapy processes at fx such as me, then they would look very different. For, in fact, ‘lack of desire’ is merely a symptom, a result of how we live our lives. And why is it the way to live and view our lives, as we will have to look at, " says Bentzen.

She explains that a live therapist can, ask the individual, take a look at its resources, do the same with its partner and hence come up with new ways of looking at things so that it supports and pushes:

- And then keep a live therapist one to the fire. It is much easier to postpone a deal with your online class, than it is to postpone an appointment with a live human being. I hear only rarely that people actually get implemented whole class project.