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Review: The 'Texas Chainsaw,' a hippie-hipster hybrid, is back

Is it you, pause button? You were my friend, I thought.

- 217 reads.

Review: The 'Texas Chainsaw,' a hippie-hipster hybrid, is back

Anticipating the inevitable blood, gore, and murderous mayhem, Netflix's new Texas Chainsaw Massacre" was screened on my TV in broad daylight. The sun was streaming through my windows, and I had my remote in my hands all the time.

Things dragged on and I became complacent. Then, I realized that the pause button was too far away for me when I needed it. This was a shocking moment that I didn't see coming. Although I will not reveal the exact moment, I can tell you that if your plan is for a pause button to save your plans, then good luck!

Even though the scene is a great shocker, it begs the question: Do we really need another movie? Unfortunately, given the lack imagination, creativity, or basic attention to logic in this script, it seems that the answer is a clear "Nope".

Unless you want to see lots of chainsaw death. There is.

The sequel, which will be directed by David Blue Garcia and written by Chris Thomas Devlin is described as a direct sequel. This means that we should forget the eight previous movies. OK, done! Tobe Hooper directed the 1974 film. It has been called disturbing and disgusting, but it is also a classic in the genre. The story involved a group made up of hippies in the 1970s who were forced to live on the Texas ranch of a cannibal family. The chainsaw was unleashed. Only Sally, a young woman, survived.

From hipsters. We have an idealistic group of 20-something entrepreneurs in Austin who decide Harlow, Texas is the perfect place to buy up and gentrify. They arrive just as a busload full of investors arrives, ready to party.

Dante (Jacob Latimore), and Ruth (Nell Hudson) are the main characters. The film's two most fleshed out characters are Dante (Jacob Latimore) and Ruth (Nell Hudson). Melody (Sarah Yarkin), Dante’s partner in the venture, as well as her teen sister Lila (Elsie Fisher), who is the emotional scarred survivor from a school shooting. (The few scenes that refer to this shooting seem gratuitous even in a slasher movie.

It doesn't always go as planned. They arrive at an abandoned orphanage they bought and find its elderly and sick caretaker Alice Krige, who lives there with her last boy. The hipsters force her to leave and call the police. Bad idea. The "last boy", tall and frightening, wears masks made of human skin that are not his own.

It's Leatherface. Mark Burnham plays it (silent, but physically, umm, imposing). Although he is a lot more senior, he still has his chainsaw. In fact, it is the original chainsaw from 1974. He's furious. Sally (Olwen Foluere) is also still alive. She is also angry.

This is it for plot. Surprise! A chainsaw is durable and Leatherface has not seen any changes in its effectiveness over the past 48 years.

Nor have many other things. Half a century of technological and social development has not made much impact. Yes, the car has a GPS, but the majority of young people use Instagram and smartphones. That's all.

For diehard fans, all this might still suffice. However, the funny moments in the movie are created at least by the mentioned smartphones. The rampaging Leatherface, a bloody chainsaw-wielding maniac, appears in front of a large group of hipsters. They don't immediately scream or run; instead they grab their smartphones to livestream. One threatens to "cancel” Leatherface.

It's a joke to release tension before the scene that is sure to be the most grotesque ever shot on a party bus. But we'll take it (along with a blink-and-you-miss-it meta-joke from the director.) If you're anything like me, this shouldn't cause you to loosen your grip on the remote. You'll soon need the pause button. You might also want to fast-forward a bit.

The Motion Picture Association of America has rated "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" R for "strong bloody horror violence and gore and language." It runs for 81 minutes. One star out four.


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