What our favorite songs say about us

"I hate showing up out of the blue uninvited. But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it. I was hoping you would see my face and be reminded that it's not over for me." Millions of people know this melancholy monologue - intoned in English by star singer Adele, it rose to the lovesick hit of 2011 .

Now "Someone Like You" has had a second career; this time in research. Together with hundreds of other songs, it served scientists as a seismograph to measure the mental life of test subjects - more precisely: their behavior in relationships. The psychologists led by Ravin Alaei from the University of Toronto wanted to find out whether the preference for certain songs reveals something about social life. Their analysis appeared in the journal Personal Relationships, concluding: Favorite song lyrics can actually reflect a person's attachment style—at least in part.

For their analysis, the Canadian researchers recruited 469 subjects and asked them to name at least seven favorite songs with lyrics about interpersonal bonds. The 4,853 named songs were then assigned via text analysis to one of three relationship modes: the anxious attachment style, which is associated with doubt and fear of rejection; the avoidant attachment style, characterized by emotional detachment; and the secure attachment style based on trust and confidence. The song "Someone Like You," for example, was cited frequently, according to Alaei, and - like most of Adele's work - falls into the anxious attachment style category.

At the same time, the scientists recorded which attachment types the subjects assigned themselves to and how they performed in the Big Five personality model. The concept includes five factors that are more or less pronounced in every human being: open-mindedness, perfectionism, extraversion, agreeableness and neuroticism, i.e. emotional instability and vulnerability. The team then examined what statistically significant associations there were between participants' favorite songs and their personality traits.

The most notable effect was seen among subjects with avoidant attachment styles: They also preferred "avoidant" songs that involved withdrawal from their partner or fear of intimacy—from Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean" to Beyoncé's "Irreplaceable." But the phenomenon wasn't always that strong: "I expected to see a clear connection between anxious people and anxious songs, because those are the most emotional," says Alaei. "But surprisingly, this was the weakest result."

In the case of the anxious-avoidant attachment style, the preferences were exactly the opposite. In this mixed form, which varies between affectionate and dismissive, those affected preferred songs with a feeling of security: "Love Me Do" (Beatles), "Wouldn't It Be Nice" (Beach Boys) or the duet "I Got You Babe" (Sonny

This leads to the question: Is it at all helpful for the ability to relate to music that confirms one's own attachment style - or is it actually a hindrance? What does it do to an already anxious person to hear Adele's despondent heartbreak anthem on a loop? Alaei sees a need for research here, but advises self-knowledge as a preventative measure: one should be clear about which attachment style one embodies and whether one is susceptible to "negative feedback loops". Presumably, one would like to add, it could also help to keep your hands off the repeat button.

"Aha! Ten minutes of everyday knowledge" is WELT's knowledge podcast. Every Tuesday and Thursday we answer everyday questions from the field of science. Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Deezer, Amazon Music, among others, or directly via RSS feed.