How to be a friend?

"You sit next to her on the floor. The rapid inandningarna when she is trying to control the weeping to tell of what has happened is unbearable to listen to. For you are the best of friends, you love her and you hate when she cries. But now the cry she. Again. "

"You ask what he has done this time and it's the same old show. It is not the first time. You hold her for you don't really know what to say, but when she stops you still want to say something. Something that will help. And all that is now, your doubtful, comforting words, her black mascaratårar and his betrayal. "

"She's wondering what she should do, but what do you answer someone who already knows the answer, but who do not want to take it in, who want to hear but not listen. Dump him. Just leave. It is time to go. She knows. You know. But what will you answer?"

"in Any case, had you just screamed it straight out: that will be the END! But all the time the risks must be balanced. If you nag too much or is too hard, there is a risk that she dumps you. It becomes a headache. In destructive conditions, it is common that the person becomes isolated, and the only thing that is worse than she is with him is that suddenly she only has him."

"It is a delicate balancing act, for at the same time, you don't want to play with in the game, not to reduce or to normalize his behavior. "

"it is she herself already so it is enough and over: reduce events, invents excuses, blame themselves and shoot all the time on what should be the inevitable – the break-up. So is it not your responsibility as a friend to provide a reality check, to remind her that she deserves more, set the limits, she did not put and refuse to maintain the relationship, that makes her feel shit? "

"Someone has to dare to say that he is stupid in the head? Someone has to stop and sit and laugh with and be polite at dinner parties, when you know that he was an asshole last yesterday?"

"But at the same time, you know that it is up to each one how and with whom one chooses to live. And also, you know that if you push too hard she might no longer dare to open up to you anymore, suddenly unfolds her whole life behind the curtain, none of which has transparency. Or so cuts she completely. And if it is not she who cut: how long will you yourself be able to have these conversations? Listen to the same events, share the same pain, give the same advice, only to get the same result: she gets left behind. "

"To the end there is almost only nagging and eco left of the friendship, for the wound from the joint pain become too large. You do not want to let go of her, but understand at the same time, the friends that have already left. The end is not able to more, or simply have given up. And the other friends she had, they said, as she left."

"And the more people that leave her, the lonelier she gets, the harder she gets out, take the back. Back to what? When he is her entire world, it is almost impossible to leave."

"So what do you say? Maybe wipe only her tears, makeup and snot while you still repeat that you will be there and that she deserves better, waiting and hoping that she leaves to the end of the year. "

"What you choose to do will this uncertainty remain. For if it is not arranged up for your friend will probably question always echo in your head: "

"I Should have done more?"